The meandering debacle known as my life has served to inspire my art and horrify others. In no particular order, I volunteered at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics, worked on the set of Red State – a movie written and directed by Kevin Smith – took up improv at UCB Theatre in New York, got drunk out of the Stanley Cup – THRICE – rode a lot of jet skis, broke several jet skis, took one homeless guy to Burger King, played as mascot to a baseball team in Texas (Frisco Rough Riders) and a hockey team in the New Jersey (the NHL's Devils), beat flesh-eating bacteria, miraculously survived an impossible car wreck – it regrettably ended my aspirations of becoming a pro wrestler: Shredded Wheat, the Cereal Killer – and devoured MANY pizzas from behind the counter of Antonio’s, a slice of Heaven at Thayer Street, Providence, RI, which I ultimately justified by picking up a marathoning habit (9 of 50 states completed; all under four hours). I kicked that habit by starting a family. I now have a wife I adore, a daughter I cannot live without and a job in advertising. Once upon a time, my house burned down.